How to get along

This is a list, in no particular order, of the most practical advice that I've heard, read, or learned over the decades. While a few of these appear to apply more to business and employment, they actually apply in all interactions with other human beings.

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• Don't save the best for last. As a practice, saving the best for last reduces our appreciation for all the lesser stuff because we tend to focus on the best parts. Conversely, when the best is gone, that which remains has a larger significance. (Since I deduced this while eating a watermelon slice, reserving the sweetest center for last, I dubbed it Watermelon Theory #1.)

• Don't expect or demand that things be perfect. When trying to make things work among human beings, insisting any plan or performance be perfect will likely debilitate the participants and defeat the purpose. However, it is not an excuse to fail to do your best work within the time and resources allotted. (This is a formalized version of my Watermelon Theory #2, which arose from a decision to swallow the seeds rather than spit them out. It's a long story.)

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• Take on the job everyone dreads. It usually provides the most opportunities. (I've dubbed this one my Dirty Garage Theory, a conclusion from a time when I was about eleven years old and I decided, on my own, to clean and straighten up our family's two-car garage. I think my folks were still giddy about that when I went off to college.)
• If you can do a job sitting down, then sit down. Don't make a job
  harder than it has to be, for yourself or others. (This I credit to a co-worker, back in the day.)
• Fail often. Practice assumes failures, and you don't get good at

  

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  anything without practice. Embrace your failures. Learn from them; they're likely your most valuable lessons. (Lots of folks had this figured out long before I did.)
• When you've screwed up, own up to it without hesitation. It not only reduces the wind in your critics' sails, it can increase your respect among others. Still, it's always hard to do; better get used to it. (I figured this one out years ago when I went to the boss and told him how and why I'd made a mess of things, what I'd done to sort things out, and what I would do to make sure it didn't happen again. He regarded me in silence for several seconds, then grouched that I'd left him nothing to say, as I'd already covered all his points. He told me to get back to work.)
• When you've screwed up, go out of your way to make up for it, even if

  

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  it costs extra. This is especially true if you've disappointed a customer, an employer, or a loved one. Or anyone else. (From A Passion for Excellence, by Peters and Austin.)
• Promise less, deliver more. Be absolutely certain you can deliver what, when, and for how much you promise. Better to underestimate than overestimate your performance. Then do better: more, sooner, or for less. (Also from A Passion for Excellence.)
• Don't save up your good times for retirement; take them when you can. (From a retired and disabled acquaintance in La Junta, Colorado, about 1972. From personal experience, I'm glad I followed his advice.)
• I saved the best for last. Do unto others as you would have them do

  

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  unto you. You just can't go wrong when applying the Golden Rule. But, to avoid a common misunderstanding, treat others the way they'd like to be treated, the same as you'd want your preferences observed by others. For instance, just because you like licorice doesn't mean that other people do, too.

It's difficult to appreciate ideas like these until you've really fouled-up a time or two and are willing to look at yourself critically. And it usually requires the full development of the brain's frontal lobe. The frontal lobe is where fine judgment and evaluative abilities are centered. The maturing of that region often extends into one's mid-twenties.

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So, that's it, the best I've got, after sixty-eight years. I wonder if having this list when I was twenty-five might have made a difference? With a heavy sigh, I have to reckon not. Experience is the best teacher. But maybe having ideas like these in hand would have crystallized the lessons sooner. Maybe.

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